To be trusted is a greater compliment than being loved. – George MacDonald
There are things that we can’t force others to give, and respect and trust are two of the most essential ones that belong in this category. You can’t force someone to trust you, but you can earn their trust. You can’t force someone to respect you beyond the most basic human respect we’re owed to each other. But if you can get them, they are absolutely worth it. Here is how you earn someone’s trust.
The things you do every day matter the most
In life, the things that matter most are not the big gestures. It’s the small things you do every day. If you buy a partner a lavish gift but then don’t do any chores throughout months on end, they won’t care that much about the gift. You will not have proven to them that you can be trusted.
It’s important to be consistent in keeping our promises and commitments, most days. Sure, we all have emergencies and problems. However, we should not make a habit of breaking our word, otherwise, people will not respect it or even believe us. Everyday actions matter the most to see if others will trust us or not.
Your words matter less than your actions
Saying and communicating are essential. But it’s not enough to communicate. You need to make sure that your words and actions match most of the time. We can all be wrong or have an unexpected obstacle. However, it should not be the norm, but the exception.
Our words matter less to other people than our actions. Those around us can observe and recognize what we are doing and if we are not being coherent, it shows. It could even be worse: we might be perceived as liars or two-faced individuals, which makes others less trusting. Instead, try to be consistent and communicate what’s going, ensuring your words match your actions.
It can take a while
Some people are quick to trust, but most are not. Trust and respect tend to be slow-growing, and you can’t rush them along. They are like plants that need to be watered and exposed to the sun; that way, they will grow in their own time.
Taking the time to let them develop can be frustrating, but in the end, the rewards will be worth it. You will have a solid bond, and trust is usually mutual, so there will always be someone there for you, someone who trusts you.
It’s easy to lose
Just as trust as hard to gain, it can be easy to lose. However, the value it brings to your life is worth it. Being trusted means that you have something to value. Losing trust means doing something to betray it, and it’s essential to avoid that.
While it’s not always easy to do the right thing, most times you will know exactly what that requires. Somebody’s trust in you can encourage you to stick with what you know is right, promoting better choices.
It’s worth seeking from the right people
An important caveat is that you don’t want just anyone’s trust and respect. It’s a mutual thing, so it’s usually best that you can also trust the other person, and, as established, that’s not an easy goal to achieve. Seek the respect of the people you respect and the trust of those you want to trust.
It’s not worth it pursuing the respect of a person who is not someone worth it. Some people will make you fight for their respect and trust and then never give it, no matter what you do. That’s a battle you will never win and one that is not even worth starting.
Avoid trying to please the people you dislike or who hold values that you find unpleasant. You don’t have to earn everyone’s trust and respect, and it’s better to be trusted by a small group of people you appreciate than everybody, much less the people you dislike.
Trust and respect are worth it every time, when you find the right people. It’s worth trying to earn them, because as rewards, they are more valuable than any material object.
